Friday, February 29, 2008

Banging on Drums and Breaking the Emergency Glass.....

You know how when people get angry, they do things unintentionally.....things that they know will come back and bite their asses. They throw tantrums, burst into tears and say things which they know that they wouldn't normally say.

I have this friend, she got kind of mad today when she found out that her ex's girl friend had hacked her email address. We were at band practice when she told me about it......I tried to look it in a glass half-full way and she almost ate my head off. Seriously, (she plays side drum, BTW) she started banging on and it and shouting. Me and Maxee on the other hand, we actually burst into laughter; which I know is really insensitive or whatever but SERIOUSLY she looked hilarious!

I guess we all have times when we just lose control........like when we're playing an arcade game and you've played the same level for about fifteen times and still lose, you kick it with your leg and start shouting. We give up and press the stop button.

Life has us running around in circles, spinning in a carousel which never stops......I personally don't like carousels, I never have. They always end up making me puke and watching French fries and chocolate come out as puke isn't exactly what I would call my kind of thing. We either have the brown paper bag, or we don't. Sometimes, it may seem like the world is ending, or that you have no purpose.............

BUT THE REST OF THE TIMES.................you spend it, crashing cymbals and laughing with the guy that makes your entire day worth it................. Lolz. Yea, seriously, it makes life a whole lot better. Because, the ugly truth is, when you feel like the world going to end, you either need new friends or a new world. One or the other. I have amazing friends, or at least AN amazing friend who makes me laugh whenever I look at him....... But we even have our rough times. I suppose that in those times... you really need to find something to bang on or at least an emergency glass to break.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Ode to my Wonderful Friend

You know how when you spend a few days with the same people and you actually get to know how they are, whether they're just people with smiles pasted on their faces or people who like to ave the smiles slapped on their faces. They just wait around for a moment when they can say something about you behind you back. The others stick around with you no matter what, praying eating, even when you get shoved into a cubicle together because your crazy cadet instructor wants you to hurry. All I can say is, thank God I have at least one person I know will stick with me......through it all.

Actually, this was just an indirect introduction to the fact that I just came from cadet camp. It was completely and utterly freakin' awesome! i loved and enjoyed every minute of it. From breaking eggs from the second floor to, scary stories after midnight and to romantic candle light dinners.....we did it ALL. I loved the fights, laughs and angry frowns when you have to do extra push-ups, because in the end it is all worth it. And more importantly, you have that amazing friend with you, right by your side,

THANKS MAXEE! for everything!!!

Friday, February 15, 2008

Love........

Yesterday was Valentines Day, nope, no it wasn't all that fun for me. I'm not one of those happy and perky people who celebrate Valentines Day. I'm one of those people who sit and watch the other happy and perky people celebrate it. It's not that I have a thing against the day, it's just that I have no particular reason to celebrate it.

I guess love is worth celebrating. I mean, people tend to take it for granted but when you can't be with the one you love (I'm NOT talking about me), you finally get to understand the magnitude of it. When he says he'll hold you and cherish you and love you forever, you'll learn to accept it and to know that it's not standard procedure to tell every girl or guy you go out with that you love them. Not because they'll give you a big kiss or an expensive present afterwards but because you know that even if you wait another moment life won't be the same. Happy Valentines Day to all!

Step up and tell the person you love that you love him....or her......

Thursday, February 14, 2008

A Fatansy is Better than a Reality

Today was total bliss. Actually, it was fun, not bliss because too much sun and running around was involved. I had my first head girl duty today! I had to go to another primary school with A (yes, the one in the story below)! We finally talked, OK, we had to talk but still, we did!!! My first duty and I had to share it with him, which is..... i don't know...great! We had so much fun!

You know how there are moments in life which you remember forever. Well, today this whole thing was one of those moments. Where you feel like you are living a dream and being someone else in this fantasy.

It only takes a moment for fantasy to change back to reality, where you fall back down to earth and go on with your old and prior life. But then he smiles at you, you get back into that fantasy all over again......

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Love Thy Emeny

OK, here's the story between me and A. We met last year, on the first day of band practice. We've been friends ever since! Normally, I would say that I've been through more with him than with any other of my friends. There's the 26th Parade, the utter horror of cadet practices and not to mention those band practices where the instructor does nothing except shouting, even when you do nothing wrong. I've shared some great moments with him too, last year. Mostly during there parade, where we stuck together most of the time. Especially during night practices, where it was always windy and cold and you almost can't play due to the wind; one night, the school forgot to send out instruments since we switched locations and then we had to stand all night long without playing and one by one, all the people were asking us why we weren't playing! It was horrible but we had countless laughs about it later.

I know, that so far we sounds like we should be best friends but this year, we are in the same class. People in our school, correction, our COUNTRY are very judgmental. They judge every single thing you do, if you paint your house white they'll say by June you'll have to paint it again, if you paint it blue they'll say it's too bright. My point is, my fellow wonderfully horrendous classmates judge ME a lot! The first day, me and A smiled at each other a lot, sort of for confidence and assurance. They took it the wrong way and thought we were dating! We laughed at it and went on with our lives, but they never stopped. We decided, OK fine, I decided that it was better that we stopped talking and acted like we didn't know each other for a while. He took it the wrong way and now, he's not talking to me!! Which is crazy because they finally stopped with the teasing and now he's ignoring me. So, to get to the point, we are now enemies.

There's a proverb which says 'Love Thy Enemy' we ran across it today in English class, I think it completely defines the relationship I have with him. Sometimes he's so annoying that we fight (literally) but then sometimes we smile at each other almost as if we understand what's going on underneath our surfaces. I don't know, all I know is I miss him. I'm not ready to give up those smiles, it feels safe, like the world has stopped spinning and we're all alone. So, what IS this????

Monday, February 11, 2008

Winning the Battle, Losing a War

I have HUGE news!! I won the election!!!!! YAY! But then again, with laughter comes tears, one of my friends didn't get a post and cried her eyes out! I felt so bad for her, I spent the entire time at school feeling crummy.

But I guess things are looking really good for me from now on. The teachers are all really proud of me, one thing which shocked me was that I didn't know that they cared so much.....it might be the work of my grandma's good luck charm. I never really believed in good luck charms, four-leaf clovers or well, pennies. Now, all I can say is, find a penny, pick it up and all day long you'll have good luck.

One thing which shocked me was that, when they told me I was chosen I didn't get all happy and jumpy, I felt RELIEVED, of all feelings! I mean, sure it' s a relief to know that what you have been aiming for seven years has finally become yours, but even still. I thought there would at least be some smiles and shrieks. Surprisingly NO! Apparently, my body is totally incapable of creating any happy feelings! I guess, it just hasn't sunk in yet. I don't know, maybe.

S's really happy. I'm glad for her. She's Deputy Head Girl, which means we'll get to stick together a lot! And also, there's A. I don't know what to say about him. He's in my class, and he's Head Boy. Everyone thinks its a big deal, that he's head boy and I'm head girl! I mean usually both Head Girl and Head Boy never comes from the same class, but we're just people and there have been Head Girls and Boys before us! I find the A just laughs whenever they say anything like that positively annoying. And I just forgot that I was pretending that he didn't exist (another loooonnng story)! I have caved so many times today, that I cannot believe we're still doing this no-existing thing (we're pretending with each other that we don't exist.) Apparently, the school thinks we're good-lookign couple. I say, they are nuts. Not to mention. I'm actually supposed ot be catching up on something, but I promise that I'll be posting about the loooonnng story later!

"I do not steal victory" - Alexander the Great

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Heart to Heart

Ever had a heart to heart conversation with a person? I have never had one, but today I did. Without realization, without knowledge, pride or any feelings. I had it with the most weird person, apparently he hated me ever since first grade (big shocker there). We talked about the most weird things, and I know we didn't lie, it was like, we were completely honest and on some level talking about things which made no sense......haha.

Friday, February 8, 2008

I am an Invisible Being

I'm having a bad day, really I am. I mean, it's a weekend and I woke up at six o'clock in the morning to the sound of people talking! Seriously! Why can't people let me me sleep. It's just another one of those days where nothing at all happens your way and everything ends up pissing you off.

I went to an English class last night. Not that I needed it, of course, my mum just was way to worried about me and I thought I'd cheer her up by going there. When I went, I thought I'd put up my cool-depressed looking face, you know, the one which makes everyone leave you alone, even teachers. So much for that. It all started when I said my name out loud while I was introducing myself and the teacher didn't really understand it -not that my name's all that difficult- and then he spelled it wrong, the teacher, i mean. He spelled it like "Irin" which is apparently a British name and he went on and on about how he had a close friend who goes by the same name. I raised my hand and wrecked his wonderful flashback moment by saying that my name is spelled "Aryn". Which caused everyone to burst out laughing, and the teacher too. Me, on the other hand, I turned red as a beetroot. The rest went pretty mellow, until he asked me to read a paragraph, I did so quite willingly. And then he had to do it, the guy called me a miracle!!!! Seriously, I almost melted into my chair full of embarrassment. You know how in books they always say that they wished that the floor would open up and swallow them, well, I'm confirming that you can actually wish for stuff like that to happen. He kept going on about it, which was humiliating on so many levels.

I guess I'm just not one of those people who walks into a room and doesn't get noticed. When I walk into a room everyone's heads turn at me and half the people end up smiling. The worst part is I don't usually feel like smiling back! I would give anything to be invisible, not to be noticed and to be forgotten by people constantly. I think I would lead a happy, invisible life.

"La roue sur la rue roule; la rue sous la roue reste."

"The wheel rolls on the road; the road stays under the wheel"





Thursday, February 7, 2008

Belong............

The campaigning for school posts have started.....and along with it... so has the wonderful habit of drawing mustaches on posters and writing comments. Fun right? My point is that, the whole going up to people and being all smiles and shouting "vote for me!" is SOOOOO NOT me! I'm not a people person, or a smiley person. I don't have a smile plastered on my face like some people and I don't like talking about myself that much.

Things have changed so much this year. Everyone is showing their true colours. I finally know who are my real friends, whose who are willing to give it all (not that you have to, to be my friend!). I have to say it is a relief. Although, the fact that people's parents are splitting up, and i found out about the painful history of two of my friends is heart breaking..... seriously it is sad.

I'm in a place in life right now where I don't know where I belong. But then again belonging somewhere is overrated.....